Monday, May 5, 2014

Worrying About the Size of My Uterus

So, now I sound like a man, haha.

I first became aware of my uterus size when I had my Hysteropingogram done. The radiologist said my uterus was small. This made me feel a little insecure, but when I asked my first clinic's nurse about it she brushed it aside and explained that your uterus grows with a pregnancy (I knew that one) and it was fine.

However, after leaving that clinic (and finding out that so much of what they told me may not be correct) and having done some research on premature ovarian failure I realized my uterus could be small because I was hitting menopause. I became more and more paranoid about this and proceeded to ask no less than 4 medical professionals about the size of my uterus.

First, my acupuncturist who is familiar with my hormone levels and said that was just not happening. She felt very strongly that my uterus was normal sized and I believed her (mostly, obviously, from my following actions).

Second, and probably on the same day, my counselor and I discussed my fear of a tiny uterus. They should probably create a new phobia name for it. But she and I agreed that the copious amounts of hormones (and herbal therapies) I have been on and off for the past years would have hopefully prevented it shrivelling due to menopause.

Third, my mayan masseuse, who I asked even though I was fairly confident by this point that it wasn't a problem. But since she is massaging my uterus to stimulate blood flow I figured she would know if it's too small (right?) and she said, no, it was fine. However she did point out that I am fairly small between my hip bones and am probably 'proportional' in uterus size. This also means that my large hips are my own damn fault and I probably don't have 'child bearing' hips, just lots of extra flesh on them.

Fourth, my doctor, who I wasn't even going to ask, I swear! I had it written down on my question list for the appointment and then decided it was silly and I knew I was fine. I did not ask during the appointment, but when he was ultra-sounding my ovaries to see if I had a lot of eggs (spoiler, no) he also measured the size of my uterus. I mean, how can I not ask at that point? And it is 'within normal range', and I learned my doctor has an amazing poker face for ridiculous questions.

I am still suuuuuuuper bitchy.  I don't think there's even a chart for how bitchy I am.  I do manage to keep it locked in ... mostly ... at least I don't take it out on my husband.  I do feel bad for my coworkers...

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