Saturday, October 11, 2014


During cycles, and this counts even though I am not supplying the eggs, I like to keep all stressors at a minimum.  It's one of the reasons I left my job... the other reasons was that I hated that job.  Here are the things that are or have stressed me out this cycle, some are more serious that others (you can figure it out): 

Ebola: obvious reasons.  Actually I love the study of how germs/bacteria/diseases spread and, dare I say, am fairly well versed in most major diseases (for a lay person).  Part of this is my interest (BA degree) in history, since history can be best understood when also understanding environmental factors that play into it.  So normally I'd love to follow this disease, but I'm not a huge fan of catching diseases.  Also there are other diseases, not typically airborne, that have become airborne.  So there's that.

My toenail: it considered starting to become an ingrown toenail and I wondered if I should see a doctor but I didn't want to mess up this cycle with antibiotics.  So I did what I would normally do and popped it out and did a few Epson salt soaks.  The pain faded slowly, but is now totally gone (thank goodness).  I've actually never had a truly ingrown toenail, but the thought of one terrifies me!

This carrot: I do not have small hands, why is it so big?  How did it get this way?
Not the best picture, I realized it was blurry only after I cut up the carrot.

My sore throat: was it a cold? was it allergies?  Is it an effect of the Lupron? Either way it keeps coming and going.  Which reminds me that I need to buy some bottled water for my Neti pot, otherwise it will get worse again.

This cat: he has felt the need to start drinking tons of water and peeing lots.  That might mean something, but I don't really want to know and consequently haven't taken him to the vet yet since he doesn't seem sick.  Unfortunately I wouldn't give an animal shots morning and night to keep it alive, it would be too stressful on both of us.

Yes, he's adorable. We got him at the Shelter a few years ago when he was 9 years old.
Making new friends at work.  It's really not much of a secret I am a totally geeky person.  However, I have a lot of experience making friends as I switched schools 9 times and lived in 3 different states.  So a new workplace shouldn't be such a hard thing.  I've been having a lot of those moments when you know you've said too much or too little or maybe put your foot in your mouth?  I am almost constantly thinking 'arrgghhh!' while walking away, hopefully conversations will start and end more naturally after a while.

This spot under my eye.  It showed up when I woke up this morning.  Where's it from?  Why is it here?  Will it go away or is it one of those stupid marks I get from being Irish and pale?  Those marks don't usually go away....
Stop judging my eyebrows. 
Everybody wants them but this is what happens when
you don't have the inclination to style them in the morning.

Estradiol: the drug company apparently thinks having a 1mg pill in light blue and a 2mg pill in teal is good? Not a fan, it makes me nervous! What if I get the bottles mixed up and take the wrong one?  It keeps me constantly guessing.
Which is blue, which is teal?
Stop being a smartass, no one asked you... oh, wait... 
Most of these I am able to let go of, but seriously that toenail thing really got in my mind.  What if I should have gone to the doctor? What if the very slight infection ruined my chances?  How did that carrot get to be so big?!?

Honestly, it's the little things that kill your confidence.

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