Sunday, October 26, 2014

Transfer

Yesterday was only my second embryo transfer ever.  My first also being a 3 day transfer of my (only) genetic children at my old clinic.  I was super mad at that clinic because they didn't give me specific water drinking instructions (you are supposed to have a full bladder) and then they made me wait more than a half hour after my appointment time to go back to the transfer room.  I have never cried because my bladder was painfully full, but I was definitely close that time.
 
And other than giving me specific water drinking instructions this clinic didn't do much better.
 
But back to the beginning, I had gotten an acupuncture appointment for both before and after my appointment (woohoo!).  Of course DH and I promptly got into an argument in the car upon arrival because I thought DH would go to acupuncture with me and he was not into that.  Which was fine but he got immediately annoyed at me for even thinking he would go.  So, of course, I was angry about his attitude (my normal thing to get angry about, speak nicely to me!).  We were fine by the time I had to go in, except I am very fair and so looked like someone who had been crying.  I don't mind crying as much as I mind looking like someone who's been crying.
 
I was checked in and given my hospital bracelet.  The acupuncturist was a total hippy, but also grandmotherly and I liked her a lot.  We did the acupuncture in the transfer room!  It was very relaxing, even had warm blankets.  She pulled the pins at about 1:45 (my transfer was scheduled for 2pm) and it seemed like everything would be starting right away.  DH had perfect timing and showed up immediately after the needles were out. 
 
A medical assistant checked us in and my bladder was feeling pretty full.  We waited for the doctor, and the clock hit 2pm.  DH wanted to go get his iPad (since we were having to wait so long) but both of us were worried it would start as soon as he left to go get it.  At 2:15 I really needed to pee and he was annoyed he could've made it to get his iPad - then the acupuncturist came back in and thought she would be doing the post transfer acupuncture... except no one had been by at all!!
 
Let me just say - I understand this is a medical procedure and medical places are often behind.  But when I am paying over $20k for a service I would like some goddamned customer service.  Stop in my room and let me know the doctor is running late.  I was beginning to get very worried that the clinic didn't know where I was (my name was up in the computer screen though, so that couldn't be true), that there was a problem with the embryos OR that they were somehow putting the embryos into the wrong person.  Also I really needed to pee.
 
The acupuncturist went and found out they were held up with an 'IUI emergency' (did they put the wrong sperm in someone?!), she probably shouldn't have told me that.  The doctor finally arrived at 2:30.  The ultrasound tech took a quick picture of my bladder and declared it 'too full'.  Both wanted me to pee just a little bit out.  I refused to even attempt this.  Once the seal is broken it all comes out, and that's what I told them.  I also feel like they should have to navigate around my giant bladder when they waited so long.  Someone could've stopped by at 2pm and had me pee and there would have been plenty of time for the bladder to refill.  Seriously.
 
Everything started happening very quickly then.  Again, some of this they could've done earlier, there was nothing stopping the embryologist from stopping in and answering our questions.  It felt a little bit rushed, but really they have no answers for why eggs don't defrost, don't develop, etc.  They did a quick mock pass and it went well.  Then they activated the embryo camera and I verified my name on the petri dish.  They showed the two little spots and then zoomed in so you could see the pretty little embryos.  We watched the little zygotes get sucked up into the catheter and then they squirted them into me!  There was no need to repeat, it was a clean transfer.  It was a very quick experience. 
 
 
Babies first picture
One has 0% fragmentation - 0%!!!
 
Before the procedure (and my last clinic said this too) it was emphasized that the very full bladder may distort the cervix and that's why they always ask you to release some when you're really full.  I am pretty sure this is bullshit, I think it's all about how squirmy you are when you need to pee.  I base this on the doctor who complimented me by saying 'I wasn't squirmy at all' and she was very impressed because most couldn't hold it without squirming and interrupting the process. 
 
 
Then I was driven home by the angriest taxi driver ever, AKA my dear husband.  There was a lot of cursing and hitting the gas really hard.  I sat in the backseat to minimize the terror.  I often wonder what it must be like to be married to a normal driver.  It must be amazing....
View of my drive home. 
So now sitting at home, relaxing for the weekend.  Trying not to be worried about whether this will work.  We have a chance of 0-2 eggs making it to blast and getting frozen.  I am more than a little bummed that 14 eggs and a lot of money has become maybe two transfers.  I am working really hard to keep the faith right now and be open to the possibilities.  I am hoping this will work really well, I'm hoping, hoping, hoping.

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